"Why are you so kind?"
One friend asked me “why are you so kind to me?”, at first I didn’t know the real answer, I thought i just don’t want those people close to me to leave. The real reason why I’m doing all these is because I’m in a constant search of feeling something, a feeling of gratitude. You know when you do all the kind things to people and then they dont thank you or at least return the favor you did for them? Well that’s what I feel every single time, and it really hurts when the person closest to you doesn’t mind your effort and shit. At this point, people would usually stop, they would think it’s pointless to do all these cause they’re always unnoticed, well, I guess I’m different or probably stupid. I continuously serve them, do what they ask, accompany them, even if it’s out of the way, cause maybe if I do these things to them, maybe they would thank me this time, maybe they would tell me how important I am for them, maybe they would always accompany me this time, like I always accompany them, maybe they wont ditch me anymore, maybe they’ll always talk to me now, maybe they’ll tell me that im doing a good job in being a friend.
Never felt what genuine gratitude is, and im in a never-ending, tiring, journey in search for it.
Always let people know that they’re doing their job well. Show them or at least tell them how grateful you are, they get tired too.